I’m walking around this campus of buildings, Fortune 50 company, it used to be bustling, now it is mainly empty, barring the daily rate consultants consulting with the Mumbai types about the remaining positions to be off shored, eg, the remaining positions that haven’t been, 2,200 gone in the past 4 years, only the last 350 on campus to go…. every fucker walks around like some drab ass retirement home for old farts with incontinence and no relatives and no money.
The only fuckers who smile and talk like human beings are the cleaners and security, and both of these are a special breed apart.
Me? It doesn’t matter what I seem to wear lately, suit and tie, jeans and a working shirt, or leathers and originals, I always feel like the outsider in some cheap spaghetti western, the guy who doesn’t fit in anywhere and who doesn’t give a fuck that he doesn’t fit in anywhere, or about the fact that 95% of the townsfolk don’t know how to handle the stranger and are scared / upset / unnerved / uncomfortable in his presence.
IBM was and is a past master at this, you can be in say Deutschland and go to IBM Germany to buy some bundle/product, and next thing you know your factory is being visited by guys from IBM afdiggastan, IBM digaffastan, and IBM bumfucknowhere, and they are actually doing the work, but for IBM it is all a clever accounting trick and none of it appears on the spreadsheets for IBM germany, so profits get fatter, meanwhile it all gets marked down as export sales by IBM bumfucknowhere etc.
Meanwhile you sit there wondering what the fuck happened to the premium product you paid for, while a bunch of IBM foreigners come over, steal all your laptops to take back to sell on Ebay Afdiggastan, have to get trained by what is left of YOUR local IT team to actually do the fucking job they were flown over to do, and then spend most of their time
complaining about the horrendous price of food / beer in the soup kitchen compared to the prices back home in Digaffastan.
In fact it is such a fuck up you sack the few remaining staff you have in a bid to balance the budget, then hire them back at minimum wage via a crap agency that usually specialises in mortuary assistants and gravediggers, so they spend all day downloading 1080p porn over the corporate OC3 and spoofing packets on the Cisco voip network so nobody can get in touch with them.
Then the coffee machine, running windows embedded, goes down because of a dirty contact in the grounds tray and you have to call a coffee company engineer in to fix it, but the coffee company went into liquidation so the engineer covering takes two days to turn up, clean a contact by blowing on it, slams the tray back it and hits the power button…. the only people left in the building who could have fixed it are bust downloading porn and freaking the voip.
Half of the security and half of teh cleaners are fucking each other, so between the two of them anything that isn’t fucking nailed down and a shit load of stuff that is goes missing in a steady stream….
Being the spaghetti western cowpoke ain’t so bad, at least I can move on when these fuckers are reduced to tumbleweed and dust bowls, which don’t see too far off now, and I may not be much, but at least I am still a fucking Man, which is more than any of you cunts, except a couple of the security guys, and a couple of the cleaning girls, everyone else is in death row.
