Wimminz – celebrating skank ho's everywhere

May 28, 2012

What MEN want.


Further to the weekend’s pub scene, I had a text from one of the guys, the young 18 y.o one, the chick who he told to buy her own drinks asked him what men wanted in wimminz, so he asked me, because he didn’t know where to start or how to put it in words.

So, wimminz, pay attention.

EVERY SINGLE ITEM IN THIS LIST is a negative point against you for any kind of relationship material, many of them are also negative points against you as being pump and dump cum bucket material, go work out for yourselves which is which.

I would suggest that if you can say “yes” to five or more of these, your future is going to be “interesting”, in the same sense of the Chinese curse about living in interesting times.

  1. You have kids.
  2. You have had more cocks than your shoe size.
  3. You have difficulty keeping a home clean.
  4. You have difficulty keeping the larder stored and cooking good home food from scratch.
  5. You have difficulty living within a strict household budget.
  6. Your inner thighs touch when you stand upright normally.
  7. You have any tats anywhere.
  8. You have or have ever had a facebook page.
  9. You ever make any claim of any kind that you have been the victim of DV or sexual abuse.
  10. You have ever had a threesome.
  11. You have ever cheated IN THEIR DEFINITION on any of the guys you have been with.
  12. You spend more on “beauty” products than you do on “cleaning and sanitary” products such as soap, shampoo and sanitary towels.
  13. You have more than 7 pairs of footwear or any description.
  14. You have more trousers/jeans/shorts than dresses.
  15. You do NOT have a waist.
  16. Your hair does not touch your shoulders.
  17. You cannot spell or do math.
  18. You like to watch soaps or chick flicks or rom coms.
  19. You have anything more than a single piercing in each ear.
  20. You do not TIUTA for your man (Take it up the ass)
  21. You cannot swallow at least 6″ of cock, and / or you do not swallow cum.
  22. You ever let your man get his own drink, whether it be coffee or a beer.
  23. You ever let your man run his own bath.
  24. Your topics of discussion ever include what your girlfriends are doing, where they are going on holiday, what they have, etc.
  25. You snore.
  26. You ever smell of anything except soap and water and perhaps FRESH sweat.
  27. You ever complain about period pains, or that you are on the rag.
  28. You ever tried to re-write your past.
  29. You ever lied to your man. This includes withholding shit like letters from the bank.
  30. You ever took a ten spot out of his wallet.
  31. You ever asked for permission to take a ten spot out of his wallet, or anything else that means opening his wallet.
  32. You ever took any kind of argument, disagreement or mood upstairs, much less into the bedroom.
  33. You ever talked down to or insulted or disrespected your man IN HIS EYES in public.
  34. You ever raised your hand against a man.
  35. You ever disrespected a man’s friends, or made them less than welcome.
  36. You ever flirted with a man’s friends, or allowed them to flirt with you instead of saying “Bob, I am with Steve, end of story.” or whatever as appropriate.
  37. You ever threw anything from the past in your man’s face.
  38. You ever put yourself before family, which your top priority is maintaining your kids relationships with their father, your husband.
  39. You get too drunk to drive more than once a month.
  40. You smoke more than 5 cigarettes a day.
  41. You take drugs.
  42. You ever fucked anyone radically outside your own ethnic group.
  43. You ever called the Police on a man.
  44. You ever called a Lawyer on a man.
  45. You ever tried to blame someone else for your own bad choices or judgement.
  46. You ever tried to ration sex with your man.
  47. You ever interrupted a man when he was speaking.
  48. You ever said Tom & Jerry or Cowboys and Indians is too violent for small boys.
  49. You ever failed to greet your man with a hug and a smile and a quick kiss.
  50. You ever failed to see your man off with a hug and a smile and a quick kiss.

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