I am reading the official affidavit of the FBI (see here and here) and I can’t believe the nonsense I am reading.

First, the “super-dooper secret agents” are charged with a) not registering as agents of a foreign government and b) money laundering. Yep, no charges of spying.

Then, it get better. According to the affidavit, the FBI decrypted a “super-dooper secret message” from Moscow explaining to the apparently clueless spies what they were supposed to do in the USA:


Good thing that these poor spies were told what they are supposed to be doing, right?

The FBI affidavit then describe how the “super-dooper spies” set up a basic wifi network to communicate between two laptops (click on the image below for the super secret “wifi for dummies” techniques):


Then one of the super-dooper secret spies is recorded talking to an FBI undercover officer posing as a Russian diplomat and the two talk in Russian!


Now, nevermind the fact that illegal agents (“no-cover” spies) do not operate in networks, and nevermind that they never ever meet with representatives of the nation their working for unless it is with their handler, it is simply insane to imagine that a Russian “illegal” would be chatting in Russian while trying to impersonate an American.

It is absolutely clear to me that all this nonsense has nothing to do at all with the Russian Foreign Intelligence Service (SVR). At best, the FBI caught some shady Russian businesspeople with contacts in Russia and Cyprus. At worst, this entire fairytale is yet another lame attempt by the FBI to prove its utility.

Either way, it is without doubt an insult to our intelligence.

The Saker