Everything ends, I think it is time I killed this too (for values of kill that include walk away, not delete) it’s like the nicotine thing, you know, you can enjoy shit that ain’t good for you, and spending too long at the coal face or looking in to the mirror… it ain’t good for you.
As a young man I wrote a letter to a national daily newspaper, letters to the editor shit, I got published, sort of…
Every single letter / word they used, was a word I wrote, but by the time they were done, deleting selected words, editing, every point I was trying to make had been deleted, and I ended up agreeing with the original article.
When the MSM says X is a filthy vile perverted paedo monster, about the only thing you know for sure is he almost certainly isn’t, and you really better not try looking at the magician’s other hand, and 100% of everything is lies and bullshit anyway.
So X years ago this country drafted men into the military to fight kill main and die, and the purpose, to defend “freedom” and “liberty” and “civilised” shit, so the draft, which is slavery, taking away rights, dehumanising, as justified because you were defending the very thing that if it existed would have made the draft impossible and unthinkable.
Hey, we changed since those days, they cry….. really, show me where, in the time-line of history, there was an event such as 1789 in France when madame guillotine ended the old incumbents to make way for new ones.. and more importantly how the old system itself got beheaded, and died and made way for a new one.
Didn’t happen. We’re still killing for peace and 100% of everything is still total bullshit, and the only metric that counts is that you can tell exactly where you lie in the grand scheme of things, if for example you like fucking six year old girls, but just between you and me bro, 4 to 5 year olds are best.
If you’re carted off to newspaper headlines screaming about the vile paedo for even writing about such things, as I did above, then you’re near the bottom of the barrel.
If there is a gentle knock at the door and the latest little girl is brought to see nice uncle peter, by the same people who took the last one away and made sure she was kept quiet, after all, you can’t let leverage like that go to waste…. then you’re near the top of the barrel.
it’s not the orgies of the senate you should be worried about, that shit is after all just after office hours partying, it’s the shit they do during office hours that should scare you, that shit makes a few dozen bleeding pre-pubescent holes the merest trivia in the scheme of things, beware Putin, not since the dim and distant have Russian jets / troops / nukes / what the fuck ever done such and such, and we must all be scared, and alert, and prepared to sacrifice, because if Putin don’t get us, ISIS will, or Ebola will, or some fucker else will, because the one thing that will NEVER be allowed is devolvement of power and choice and information to the individual level.
We’ll draft your ass or kill your ass or imprison your ass as a vile paedo before we let that happen.
You know what, there are no morals, there is no right and wrong, there is just ability, if you can fuck 4 year olds with impunity then you have ability, if you can’t then you don’t have ability. I dunno, anything is better than being a cheerleader and singing the latest hymns to the audience, or being one of the drones in the audience…. the media is incapable of telling the truth, once you grep that…
As for sin and iniquity, well, everything you can think of is going on all around you, just like it always has and always will, just human animal nature babe, no need to invoke any false flag demons.
I got nothing new to day, nothing new to observe, nothing new to discuss, it’s all same old same old, and you’re either preaching to the fucking choir or the pews or the congregation, when it’s the demons in the woods and swamps that need to hear.
Posting shit to the internet is like checking fucking IM/whatsapp every 60 seconds to see if that bitch with the big tits has replied yet, or read your last yet, or is on-line yet, it’s a total utter and complete waste of fucking time, it isn’t important either, or anything else, it’s just what you do to fill the fucking day with significance.
Well it isn’t significant, it’s noise, not signal.
Put 1,000 human beings in a biiiiig room, tell em, do WTF you like, but that big red button over there, don’t press it, if you do, the room fills with water and everyone dies.
Not if, but when, someone presses it.
Always someone willing to press the reset button, that’s all you need to know.
So it’s 24 hours since I had a smoke, and, you know, I fucking want one, I’d fucking ENJOY one, yadda yadda yadda, but *that* shit was never in doubt, it’s the side effects that are the issue, as in, it’s not exactly healthy.
For me, giving up smoking = giving up nicotine, no vapes, no patches, no shit, no nothing, and I liken smoking to midget porn or making and selling meth or being a lawyer, nobody gives a fuck how little you do, or if you only do it socially, or anything else. the only filtering people do is “doesn’t do any, ever, not even a teensy tiny bit” and “does it”.
I can’t claim to have been a fan of the smell of smoking, or the expense, or the mess, but as a drug, it has a lot to recommend it, but when common colds go, and the associated coughs stay, and start sounding remarkably like a smoker’s cough, it’s time to get back in the doesn’t do any, ever, not even a teensy tiny bit, side of things, because escalations are a bitch and clearly the autonomous self repair nano-machines could no longer cope with the does it side of things… I can FEEL a fucking tightness, you know, that’s sufficient warning, it’s not about how fast this baby will take that curve, fuck the warning signs,
Some warning signs aren’t like others, some are just thin paper over deep chasms, with don’t tread on me written on them, if you stop to read, and pay heed, ignoring the warning signs when it came to smoking, that was always good for me, cos smoking calmed me down see, dumbed down the brain, cut down the oxygen supply, lowered the intellect, raised the bullshit tolerance, made everything go slower, time for a smoke first.
Some warning signs, as MY mind speeds back up to normal, fuck me gently, life just gotta be one big episode of candid camera man, because, like, no fucker could really be as dumb as some of these people around me are making out to be…
don’t use big words, she says to me, meaning words with more than 5 or 6 letters, she’s sorry, can she have another chance, she offers sex, I have a surreal moment, the age gap is huge, if she was a decade younger that would make me a paedo, but, would it, because paedophilia and ephebophilia etc kinda implies fucking within your own species, and this bitch is so fucking dumb, well, if she is human, I ain’t, and if I am, she ain’t, know what I mean…
so this other bitch, again, had it all explained, it don’t make no odds, as I knew it wouldn’t, people do what the fuck they wanna d0, got every excuse under the sun for why it ain’t their fault, but they end up doing exactly what they fucking wanna do, and as I said in yesterdays delayed post, at my stage in life, I dunno I can tell the difference between “can’t do shit because I’m fucked” and “I can’t be fucked to do shit“, I probably could, if I made the effort, but since the end result of the two is the same, why make the effort… why not just note the lack of a result.
I await with crushing inevitability one of two outcomes, either they turn around shortly and happily announce that they will take up an offer that expired long since and doesn’t actually exist any more, followed by hurt bafflement and confusion…
… or they already know from my lack of action that I didn’t get the memo that cunt is priceless and they can be excused anything, I not playing by that rulebook, followed by hurt bafflement and confusion…
However short my fuses were as a smoker, as a nicotine withdrawal turkey, when seconds seem like minutes, they’re fucking minuscule now…. things that might have taken 72 hours or more to coalesce into feelings or attitudes or ah well it was fun while it lasted shit, not just over in 24 hours, hell, they built a mall on the site of the cemetery where it was buried when it was over, that’s how accelerated shit is.
I can see why I didn’t give up while working the day job (on vacation now) because what with the time dilation and short fuse, I’d a quit by now, ten times over.
that’s the bit of the alarm / warning I cannot easily discount, when it bleats, are you SURE you wanna walk around with your brain running on all 8???? dangerous shit man…
Yes, the addiction would say that anyway, but, that does not necessarily mean that it isn’t true
So when the young skank says stop using big words like question and tough and cheaper and elsewhere, because big words like that confuse her, but she wants sex, ah, the accelerated brain thinks it might be fast enough to dodge the land mines buried under that one, why not, this giving up nicotine shit is boring anyway…
I figure one thing we all won’t be short of going forwards is disappointment, hurt bafflement and confusion, I’m just trying to keep all that shit at a distance from yours truly.
I’m wondering just how dumb the young skank is, you must be my disciple and obey my every whim, eg be my toilet and perform all the functions of same, I’ll offer you shelter and board, after all, I’m one of those on the winning side, and “we” already had all our secret injections that make us immune to aids / bird flue / ebola / disney etc
cunt has a lot in common with nicotine you know, a relaxing drug, but is doesn’t smell good, it’s messy, too expensive, addictive and worst of all it has all sorts of negative long term health issues, not just physical health, mental health too.
Over the weekend, while burning the candle at both ends and generally walking around like a zombie, I had a moment of clarity of vision, not an insight, clarity, as in, I could see clearly how to explain a, b & c just by saying this that and the other in that order.
Sadly, or beneficially, for mankind, it’s all bloody vanished into thin air, I have no fucking idea what it was now, I can remember the feeling of clarity, and thinking I must blog dis’ shit, but I cannot think what the fuck I was thinking about.
Ho hum, can’t have been that important anyway, or maybe it was, and that’s why Agent Smith erased it from my consciousness…
I guess life is full of little inconsequential shit like that, I also witnessed, just witnessed mind ewe, I wasn’t a participant in any way, the after effects of someone doing a firmware update on a pretty large and powerful companies’ core switches, and bricking them in the process…. that’s all I know for a fact, they were doing a firmware update, and now the switches are bricked, so the company network is hard down.
…well, the other fact I know for a fact is that it was fuck all to do with me, I just saw it, and frankly that was too close for my liking, it was interesting being on the outside watching those on the inside as the seconds and minutes ticked away towards open of business on Monday (today) and various buck passing phone calls were made, but fuck all was done about actually fixing the problem.
Nobody wanted to bite that bullet, my advice would have been to grab whoever it was in the company with the authority to write large cheques, pick up the phone to San Jose and tell them you want a technician or two and a stack of four switches on the next plane to the UK, then, AFTER you open for business normally on Monday, hold a post mortem and see what the fuck went wrong with your present IT solutions.
But then, me being me, I’d have had duplicate switches sent to site, cloned the firmware and config from the existing ones, and THEN attempted the firmware upgrade on the existing ones, worst case scenario is you have wasted the expense of shipping duplicate switches to site and racking them up just in case, it would have been an expense for sure, but it wouldn’t have been a disruption.
My skills are woefully inadequate to repair the failure they suffered, as in I don’t know 1% of what I need to to walk in there and do a bare metal reinstall and a bare metal config recreation AND feel 100% confident that shit was gonna work, so maybe a case of fools rushing in where angels fear to tread, or maybe a case of those with the least competence being the most likely to over-estimate their own levels of competence, or maybe just fuck it, she’ll be right… oh fuck….now what do we do…
I’m reminded of a guy I knew / met years ago, he used to do wiring on submarines, and his attitude to data cabling in a comms rack was simple, you find some guy off the street, you give him 50 buck to go into the comms room, unplug every patch cable he can see, and just throw them all in a pile in the corner… if you cannot then walk into that room, and reinsert every single cable correctly, not just the right connection, but the right way around, then you did not have your cables correctly labelled, or your network map correctly updated.
Back then when I heard him say it, I thought “what a cunt“, nowadays, I wish I could bump into him again, I’d buy the man a beer or three.
See, that’s the other thing he used to say, if they can’t do simple shit like that and get that shit done right, then don’t trust *anything* else they do on site… and again, as the years have passed, the more right I realise he was… the site I mention above, fucking rats nest, no way they could even
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I wrote the above 11 days ago, saved the draft, and haven’t had the time to get back to it since.
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I want to give praise for my relative health. I’ve got a friend who isn’t so fortunate, the funny thing is, in shades of the first paragraph of this delayed post, I can’t tell the difference between someone who isn’t with me because they are fucked, and someone who isn’t with me because they can’t *be* fucked, at my stage in life, they both pretty much feel the same, how about them apples.
I see DMJ’s latest piece, and the thought that slides into my head is DMJ has found something he gives a fuck about, and that’s bad, because things you give a fuck about are chinks in the armour, and that got me thinking about all the chinks in my armour, and that ain’t too sharp either, on my part…
I’m on my last but one cigarette, time to quit again, got that cough that ain’t going away, long after the cold that started it has left and gone, so no doubt I’ll be snappy with nicotine withdrawal for a few weeks, fuck it, it’s better than losing that relative health I mentioned above.
That’s about it for tonight, got some vacation comin, so catch ya’ll on the flipside.
There is a truism that I face in my day job, it is not unique to my day job.
By the time I am assigned a job, it has passed through perhaps 20 individuals, all of whom work for 3 or 4 or 5 resellers of resellers and channel partners and all the other modern business lingo for everything with is not 100% “in-house”… which is 100% of everything nowadays.
In this passing through process, human nature being what it is, people only see, and read, and focus on, and then repeat and pass on, that which makes sense to them, that which they can understand, that which they grep.
All else is discarded.
“All else” being another way of describing “100% of what I, or any other engineer or technician involved in the job, actually fucking needs to know.”
So a fast food / drive in joint that can only do cash sales and cannot do proper stock ordering or staff payroll or anything else, because the internet connection has been down, for a week now and counting.
I’ve been on-site three times, nothing that I can fix or touch, eg the router itself, has a problem.
BT infrastructure guys have been on site twice, nothing that they can touch or fix, eg the cable from the street box to the master socket on the wall inside the premises, has a problem.
The problem exists in the structured cabling between the router in the wall cabinet on one side of the office, and the BT master socket on the other side of the office.
The company / site itself, well they have different organisational departments, for example an IT department, a site structured cabling and infrastructure sub-contractor, a site IT hardware sub-contractor, this prevents the site from having to employ and then send their own staff to site to fix anything.
The site itself employs a dozen staff and it is a busy / popular fast food joint that turns over thousands a day, or used to, when they were able to process plastic transactions, when their internet worked, last week
The site itself realises, sic, how important IT is to trading, this is why in all these outsourced and sub-contracted services they have SLA’s that guarantee things like 4 hour response time and so on, there is a whole paper chase of this shit extending through several layers of interconnected resellers and channel partners.
The site has still been down a week, and no actual penalties have been triggered, because everyone has done their job, on paper, “best efforts” and all that, we are all only responsible for the small slices of pie our contracts cover, individually.
When it works, the whole site hangs on one now obsolete model of cisco xDSL router that you can buy used on ebay for ten bucks, and one bog standard xDSL line that is technically the same as the bottom of the range cheapo entry level domestic xDSL connection, but at business prices, which is why they have managed to get a BT engineer to physically attend site twice, promptly.
A second backup xDSL or other line/connection isn’t on the cards, in this nickel and diming world, such expenditure is a “waste”. Who needs it, we have all these SLA’s for the single xDSL line anyway…
So, cisco console commands…
XTU-R (DS) XTU-C (US)Chip Vendor ID: 'BDCM' 'GSPN'Chip Vendor Specific: 0x0000 0x0010Chip Vendor Country: 0xB500 0xFFB5Modem Vendor ID: 'CSCO' ' 'Modem Vendor Specific: 0x4602 0x0000Modem Vendor Country: 0xB500 0x0000Serial Number Near: FCZxxxxxx 887VA-M- 15.1(4)M Serial Number Far: Modem Version Near: 15.1(4)MModem Version Far: 0x0010Modem Status: TC Sync (Showtime!) DSL Config Mode: AUTO Trained Mode: G.992.5 (ADSL2+) Annex A TC Mode: ATM Selftest Result: 0x00 DELT configuration: disabled DELT state: not running Trellis: ON ONLine Attenuation: 36.0 dB 18.5 dBSignal Attenuation: 36.0 dB 11.0 dBNoise Margin: 19.8 dB 11.0 dBAttainable Rate: 11816 kbits/s 984 kbits/sActual Power: 22.2 dBm 10.4 dBmTotal FECS: 0 0Total ES: 0 0Total SES: 0 0Total LOSS: 0 0Total UAS: 0 0Total LPRS: 0 0Total LOFS: 0 0Total LOLS: 0 0Bit swap: 0 5
This is fairly routine stuff, and it’s the bits in purple you always look at, because attenuation is a measure of line quality, anything over 45 and you start to get issues, ideally it should be under 20, but it never is… every single joint in the copper adds to the attenuation, and so attenuation should be as low as possible, and noise margin should be as high as possible. This isn’t from the actual site in question BTW, these numbers are poor, but it all works fine anyway.
So I can tell, when I go on-site, the problem isn’t the cisco router, obsolete and old as it is, but what the fuck, you guys paid for it, and it proves a point, so I’ll swap it out anyway, no change, exact same problem still exists, the line flaps and drops more than it stays up.
It’s what we will call a “copper fault”
I’ll note all this on the paperwork, and forward it up the channels.
The BT guy turn up, and does his job, notes everything on the paperwork, and forwards it up the channels.
Between us, the I’ve just done the router, and found no issues, so suggest a copper fault, the BT guy turns up, tests the copper between the street box and master socket, finds no issues, notes it must be a structured cabling issue between the master socket and router, I’m sent back to site a second and third time, because apparently BT have tested the line and there are no issues.
You see, that very first bold underlined red text bit up top, in this passing through process, that’s where the issues lie, I can do my job, the BT guy can do his job, but all the pen pushers in between only forward the bits they can see, the bits they can understand, and structured cabling is just two words to them, as indeed are line attenuation, noise margin, carrier detect, dsl showtime, attainable rate, eg the entire fucking lexicon…. moreover they are two words that sound sort of techy-ish but not very important.
What’s really important is the service level agreements and contractual obligations and customer downtimes and keeping your line manager happy happy happy, by dealing with the job on your desk so that it is no longer on your desk, it’s closed and moved on to someone else’s desk or department.
See the bold green text above…. oh yes…
And if you think this is in any way a unique or unusual or unrepresentative job, think again.
And if you think this is just because of the level I work at, think again, less than 24 hours before this I was working on some very high end, dare not name either the kit or the location, stuff, we are talking backbone stuff, 250,000 fibre customers going into one switching card, and I’m the one swapping the main card while we flip to the backup one for an hour and then flip back and test, zero service interruption… and this was just one card in one rack, together with the adjacent racks you’re looking at 20-30% of the entire UK fibre network and business and residential internet / television / phone and other data.
At *that* level, there is nobody in the system who does not speak and understand technical / engineering language, and we all double check each other, especially if talking on the phone, yes mate, I can see the link lights have gone out, can you conform your end, rack 3 core 3 fibre card 2, confirm? I confirm, you are good to go and pull rack 3 core 3 fibre card 2. Thank you, I will call you back in ten when we have done the swap. etc
*I* still get paid the same (shit..lol) rate per hour, no matter the job, whether I am in the UK backbone or skidding around on the greasy floors of a local fast food joint, it’s all the fucking same to me.
The above “passing through process” is a cautionary tale for anyone even remotely concerned about the state of western civilisation, google the Ebola clipboard guy if you like, it’s symptomatic of exactly what I am talking about here, and it is ubiquitous and universal.
And these are the “somebody” you’ll all be relying on, as in “somebody” will step in to prevent this disaster scenario from happening, when the reality is they are the water at the base of the glacier, lubricating everything, ensuring that the disaster scenario cannot be avoided.
You learn by making mistakes, that’s how life is, that’s how learning is.
Caught myself today, cos it’s been a bit quiet on the emptying my balls into some skank front, thinking of a couple of past skanks, hmm, could do with that right now…. SKREEEECH…. comes to a shuddering halt, proverbial tyres smoking.
Fuck it, it’s the warm meat I’m thinking of, not the so called personality inhabiting it, sadly one comes with the other, and history is history for a reason, and those lessons don’t need re-learning.
Course, on one level I’m exactly the same as the delusional psycho skank ho’s that pass me up because Clooney is sure to get divorced real soon now and get back on the market, , as in, item fucking unsold, and on that level that’s all there is, and I really am exactly the same as them, left on the shelf.
Would I date me? Good question, not sure I know the answer, it’s going to be a possibly / probably area of the spectrum though, which tells a story all by itself, if I’m not sure I would date me, it’s no wonder I’m on the shelf.
On the other hand maybe it’s just me, or maybe it’s the nature of things, but lately, eg 2014, I appear to have turned into a scam magnet, eg wimminz wanting something, usually cash, up front, on the promise, or at least the hope, of some gash later on, if I’m a good boy, and all kind and generous like…. yuh, baby I’d help out, but all my money is invested in a 419 ebola diamond mine.. as soon as it pans out…
But it’s the nature of things that once you open doors mentally…. so I have been on and off reviewing shit, relationshit wise, past relationshit wise… I coulda done this, I coulda done that, I coulda coulda coulda. cos, you know, it’s a fucking one man band.
Yeah, things I coulda done, fo sho, but nobody tied those wimminz hands to their sides or nailed their feet to the floor either, they all coulda done more, fo sho…
So anyway got my first customer today, only a small job, but considering you still can’t find me on the first three pages of google and the business cards still haven’t landed 9well, only ordered em yesterday..) it’s small beginnings, but still…. so, as it says up there, you learn by making mistakes, and I made a mistake, kinda fucked the job up, to my eyes anyway, show them and they are delighted, sighs, show them the fuck-up on the job that they haven’t noticed yet, they lean forwards, look at it, look at me, look at it again, look at me again, they don’t give a shit, they don’t even get what I’m on about, they are delighted… ah well… I give them a tenner off, because I learned something doing it, and that’s the trick.
Slashdot discussion about spam and spammers yesterday, they still haven’t learned, it isn’t about 1 in 1000 buying fucking fake viagra, the spammer already got paid, by the person punting the viagra, like the fucking leafleteer already got fucking paid, by the double glazing jerks.
The double glazing and viagra jerks never connect the dots, because that was 1% of the advertising budget and campaign, and nothing they do is fine grained like that, nuke Riyadh, sure, you’ll get some raghead terr’rist organisers, mission accomplished… it’s all glass and krispy kreme on the ground, so no way to tell terr’rist from collateral, but who gives a fuck, y’all already got paid.
That’s how the wimminz and niggerz be fucking up, modern western society is bereft of any logical analysis and following chains of cause and effect, yeah baby, I did gangbangs LAST fucking year, THIS year I say I wanna be with you and you alone, so what’s your fucking problem…
My problem is what I see, and what you’re trying to sell me, two different things bitch.
And ain’t that the truth, about anything and everything in modern western marketing and economies.
It’s a version of bait and switch, bit like the three cups and one ball game, except the cunts are all using transparent plastic cups, and getting pissed when you don’t keep laying your money down and then picking one of the visibly empty cups.
It’s gonna be by far the biggest problem I face with this new business, it’s the same fucking problem I face in getting a decent wimminz (yeah yeah, I know, that makes it sound like I’m looking because I iz in-com-plete and inadequate without a wimminz of ma own…lol.. but bear with me, the analogy holds good) and that problem is I set my stall out straight, what you see is what you get and no bullshit, and I don’t want any bullshit from potential customers either, you got the fucking money or take a hike.
It’s not a winning strategy, not when everyone else is playing musical chairs and bait and switch and nickel and diming everything to death, but then again, it depends on your definitions of “winning”, if it is sufficient unto me, to keep me alive and healthy and sane and independent…. well, it’s close enough to winning.
I dunno if it’s the new meme, or I just haven’t personally stumbled across it before, but this whole ethical sluttery thing, which is just polyamory by another name, which is just cuckoldry by another name, seems to be getting traction hereabouts.
What I am seeing is ever increasing numbers of wimminz who, frankly speaking, are so fucking fugly and fucked up that they should be grateful if a dog took the time to cock a rear leg and direct a stream of piss at them to denote “I woz ere” instead throwing their toys out of the pram. Mind. Boggle.
This week marks a month since taking delivery of the laser, and customers I’ve had not a one, but to be fair I’m still practising and learning and am only just ordering business cards and finishing off the labour saving back-end stuff such as a website and associated IT provisions.
This isn’t contrary to my initial thoughts on the subject, and one of the issues I face is the issue of time, a lot of mine goes in the day job, another slice goes on the necessities of life, it doesn’t leave as much as a new business deserves, which is why going in I knew this had to be a softly softly catchee monkey, not a big blowout mega opening day extravaganza.
There is an inordinate amount of time wasted establishing and procuring sources of various arcane things, from pure ethanol to clean the lenses and mirrors to establishing a link with a supplier of acrylic in such a way that they are impressed with what you do, oh yes, freebies for display purposes… it all takes *time*
Nor are you blessed with instant expert skills upon your purchase, you need to learn to use the fucker, and here I can finally understand the Epilog approach, hide everything technical and give the cunts a book with the correct settings for every possible job, and set the whole thing up with “easy to use powerful and flexible” control software that limits more than it enables.
While everyone is sharing videos showing claimed cutting speeds in mm/sec and claimed power levels (75% of what? What power is your laser, how good is the tube, how good are the optics) and so on, and by the way, the videos themselves are all low quality, I’m finding the truth (and I’m posting full HD quality videos of it all) is that the secret is often that quality comes with the minimum power to do the job, at whatever slow speed that happens to be.
I’m finding 25 mm acrylic cuts best at 1 mm/sec and 50 watts, 10 mm acrylic cuts best at 2.5 mm/sec and 30 watts, and 3 mm acrylic at 11 mm/sec and 30 watts, and I get almost perfect optical quality edges from all of those, and none of those numbers ties in with anything else I have found on-line, when I use THOSE numbers, it’s like trying to cut chocolate with an oxy-acetylene torch…. sure, it fucking cuts, mostly, in the minimum time, mostly, but the quality of the end product……. bleh…
BTW the images you see here are 80 mm high lettering raster engraved onto slate, and that slate has been scrubbed with a scourer and detergent several times to prove the durability, and a letter cut into a block of 25 mm thick acrylic, it’s a tight push fit BTW, hold it on its side and the letter won’t just drop out, both pics links to full size. The second one is a particularly confusing one to look and and indeed photograph, because of all the internal reflections and refractions.
So, meanwhile, back at the ranch, there isn’t a queue of customers outside the door of my laser cup-cake boutique, it’s not exactly the launch of a flagship crApple store, but that’s the point, anything done on a single human scale can’t emulate that, trying just dooms you to even bigger failure, it’s a lot like dating, back in the day, or getting a job, back in the day, or anything else, back in the day, where it took slow and steady and consistent to make gains and headway.
Oh, I’ve had enquiries, and some of them may yet turn out to actually happen, but I’m way too old to confuse an enquiry with a cash sale done and dusted yesterday, and in the meantime I’m learning and practising, and one of the things I’m learning has sweet fuck all to do with laser processing of materials, and that’s signs.
I’m now at the point where I can make you what I think are the best, quality wise, edge lit acrylic signs you can get anywhere, and my policy is simple, cost of materials + cost of machine time = cost of product, and my machine time cost ain’t peanuts buddy, I think it is extremely reasonable, especially when you see what it can do in an hour…
And I look at what I can do, and the price, and I look at what others are offering, and when I eventually manage to drill far enough down to get a price… well…. I’m learning that for you to charge that much, you got a largely idle machine and you’re trying to cover costs that way….
I can make the 500 x 470 mm sign on the right in an hour, that’s fifty quid plus maybe twenty for the 10 mm acrylic, I can make the base that this and any other 500 mm wide sign can slot into in 30 minutes, that’s twenty five quid plus a tenner for acrylic, and the fancy schmancy remote controlled RGB LED kit is another twenty five quid.
So, 50 + 20 + 25 + 10 + 25 = 130 quid, call it 250 bucks, for a 0.5 metre square edge lit acrylic sign, with no real limit on what you want engraving on it, complexity wise, costs me about two bucks in electric to make, while I sip coffee and smoke and watch the machine for 90 minutes (and no, the photo doesn’t even fucking begin to do the quality justice, hell, I ripple all the edges to make them POP out visually instead of just straight cuts) three of these and week and I can fucking live, day job or no day job….
And what’s more to the point, there is enough of ME, enough attention to detail, enough attention to quality, enough attention to making you go WOW when you get the finished product in exchange for your cash, that I know for a fact none of the cunts charging 4x or 5x what I do can even come close.
And this is just one thing the machine can do, with just one material, and that right there is the issue… for too many people, shit is a mono-culture.
Husband = wallet, there is nothing else to marriage except access to hubby’s wallet, there is nothing else to starting a business except to call yourself a CEO and award yourself a Director’s Mercedes on lease on day one, there is nothing else to sex except having a mind blowing orgasm.
And it’s not enough.
It doesn’t matter how great I think, for example, my edge lit acrylic signs are, or what great value they are, or how few I need to sell each month to stay alive, if that is all I try and do with the machine it is going to sit largely idle, and before you know it I’ll be talking a thousand bucks a sign, fuck it, the Hilton can afford that shit, so why not…
Which brings us back to this ethical sluttery shite, cunts think that because they are sorta up front and open about what they are doing, which is taking all they can get on a free ride, that being open about it makes it all OK, fuck it, armed robbers are up front about what they are doing (unlike the guvvmint) but that doesn’t make it OK or sustainable.
You got to put more fucking effort in.
I didn’t get the acrylic signs to the point where I’m proud to put my name to them and I’ll sell to any cunt by chance, I had to learn the machine and learn the material and make a whole bunch of mistakes and experiments, I like that, but I don’t like that, so what if I change this like this, and tweak that like that, rinse and repeat.
You have to GIVE A FUCK.
Life is full of shit I don’t give a fuck about, because I am forcibly disconnected from having any influence on the outcomes no matter what I do.
But there are things where the only disconnect from having any influence on the outcome is where you do that shit to yourself, like calling yourself an ethical slut and enjoying the “free” ride.
But it ain’t free brother.
I make the *best* edge lit acrylic signs around, I can say that after one month of pulling the trigger and making the effort. Have I sold even one to a paying customer? No, not yet, and strangely I’m not troubled by that, I’m using two of them for passive illumination in my lounge… >;*)
Not just wimminz, so much as people generally…. they go for the low hanging fruit, every time…
Not for them the tilling the soil, planting the seed, tending the crop, and harvesting a year later, too much hard work, too little immediate gratification, too distant and tenuous..
Nor do I think anyone is immune from it, we all do it to some degree or another, what has changed is that in our efforts to create a technologically based civilisation, we have created one that pandered to our tendency to grab low hanging fruit.
Nobody makes any effort, because for too many things they don’t have to, so for those things that just turn into shit when nobody makes any effort, which turns out to be a hell of a lot of stuff from interpersonal relationships on down, everything has turned into shit.
I’m sitting in a fucking hotel cooling my heels, a bullshit course during which I will learn NOTHING AT ALL, what the fuck am I supposed to learn from some cunt who writes on the whiteboard about the “PA RISK” chip…. I shit you not…
The fucking swinging scene up here midweek is *dire*, as in, yes it is a much bigger population centre than where I live, but that just means a lot more assholes only interested in low hanging fruit, and of course they have all, individually, met a lot of assholes only interested in low hanging fruit, which is why places like new yoik and londinium got so iniquitious before everywhere else, the population density doesn’t just mean there are more assholes per square mile, it means everyone living there has met more assholes than anyone living anywhere else.
And of course the “low hanging fruit” is relative, swinging is / should be all about low hanging fruit, certainly when compared to dating or picking up some bint in a club, but where the population density is higher, the quality of the low hanging fruit is lower, because everyone else has met too many assholes.
It’s the same for self advancement, I’m trying to make my new business work, and as anyone who has tried it knows, it is all uphill against the flow, but, on the other hand, it’s the only way, it won’t fall into your lap any other way, and yet…. and yet, trying to find people prepared to even understand that, much less do it… no, they are all too busy picking low hanging fruit.
So pick some random wimminz, doesn’t matter how good she looks, or how ugly, or anything else, you’re never going to get past the low hanging fruit syndrome, nobody is going to make an effort, why should they, every time everyone has done it in the past they have been shit on… or call it the spirit of the age… or the tragedy of the social commons.. or the collateral damage of feminazism and western so called capitalist policies.
It’s the same trying to find an employee, or an employer, or anything.
Someone wants me to laser some shit up, but he doesn’t know what font he uses for his shit, because someone else did that for him, mates rates, and it’s been three weeks and that particular question hasn’t been answered, which I can dig, but they haven’t said fuck it and just chosen a new or similar font and fuck the mates rates and the mate and re-do the whole fucking company branding thing, because it’s obviously shit they way it was done.
Someone else wants me to put some branding on some exotic high end PC gaming shit, laser engraved baby, but fuck it, 5 bucks per item seems like a lot, nobody is gonna look at that shit anyway, so how about we go for the low quality 2 buck a pop shit.. take a fucking hike mate, I’m only as good as my last job, and if I do that 2 buck a pop shit, my last job will have been shit, and I’ll have 100 bucks to show for it…. not… fucking… happening…
Low hanging fruit, can’t even find sluts any more, used to be NWA, niggers with attitude, now it’s SWA, sluts with attitude, hell, everyone with attitude, me too.
Not seeing how that is anything but a bell that once rung cannot be un-rung.
So no matter what you do nowadays, such as trying to get a business off the ground, it’s all very much like wading in shit, and maybe, for me at least, however crap that is, it is better than just standing in shit, or floating around in it, being carried around by whatever currents there are.
So all the independent sluts who didn’t want to know six months ago, now they suddenly need a job or this or that or car fixed or something, well, coulda helped out bitch, yeah, low handing fruit, you keep my balls empty I’ll do something for you, but now that’s all gone, because, after all, we all know, you got no intention of doing shit to get what you want, and I got no intention of doing shit to get what I might like, at least not up front, maybe after I see you making some effort… there’s a hole in my bucket, dear lisa.
Enjoy what’s left of 2014 folks, I think the rates of change and starting to pick up, round and round she goes, where she stops, nobody knows… not now dogs in spain get ebola, and people in ukraine don’t get gas, and so on….
I’ve said it many a time, when I was 15, the age of 40 seemed an unimaginably distant stretch into the future, and at no point was I ever imbued with any notable instincts to preserve myself for future long term health etc.
At times I have indulged drink and drugs to considerable excess, for sustained periods, at no time have I ever adopted any kind of healthy eating, healthy diet, or health or exercise gig of any kind… I also detested and avoided any kind of sport, especially at school.
Irrespective of how well or badly I am doing now, and I can’t be doing that bad, when I have a Monday to Friday 9 to 5:30 day job, and I am out back in the workshop most evenings until gone 10 or 11, and all day Saturdays, back when I was a mouldy young late teen or mid twenties young lad, I was a lot better than I am now.
So, imagine my WHAT-THE-FUCK…
See, there’s this young girl, and by young I mean early to mid twenties, she’s 24/25, and she has a mouthful of bad teeth, I mean, seriously so, apparently she hasn’t ever done much in the way of drink or drugs, it’s largely a diet of Coke, the soda drink… she reckons.
Now me, between the booze and the speed and physical damage via impact, I can’t say I had a great set of gnashers by the time I was 40, I certainly didn’t have a complete set, I’d had about 5 or 6 molars out that got broken up, and many of the rest were frankly the worse for wear, so I said fuck it and had the fucking lot extracted, and got a complete upper and lower denture, not for me implants or any of that shit… best thing I ever did.. apart from get glasses instead of laser surgery.
However, I was in my forties when I did this, and on the day I went in, my teeth looked ten times better than this skanks;, and she is at least twenty years younger than I was then.
Nor does it end there.
Her podgy fat body tells the same tale, and I haven’t seen her naked much less fucked her, but I suspect it would be even worse naked, with the smelly cunt and ass syndrome of all fat bitches everywhere, because they can’t reach to wipe properly, and because the flesh is always touching and sweaty and never exposed to the fresh air, unless she is on her back legs apart, just in case you need somewhere to park the bagger.
What I am talking about here is an across the board sort of decrepit and decline and decay, but to find it in one so young, you’d think they’d been mainlining ebola and krokodil since they were sixteen, I mean, how the fuck else do you fuck up a human body so fast?
It’s not like the basic human DNA in this region can have drifted so far in two generations, so, something the fuck is going on here.
To be sure, there are plenty of twenty-somethings walking around here I’d fuck shitless in a heartbeat, university town after all, but, there are also vast numbers like the skank in question.
It’s not just their flesh that has decomposed either, their brains are the same way, yeah, my smile may well be artificial, but it’s presentable and clean and healthy, ditto my artificially enhanced spectacled eyes, apart from that, going more than a bit thin on top and bits of grey appearing, but, fuck it man, mid fifties, I ain’t complaining.
But no, not that I fancy the skank, sure, if it’s for free I’ll empty my balls into it doggy style, but that ain’t saying much, but she assumes that because I’m talking to her I’m trying to chat her up and fuck her, and the thing is, she don’t fancy me, like I is a mingin’ old fart innit grandpa, who’d wanna fuk u? Not her…
WHAT-THE-FUCK….
And they all like “bad boys”, but when they are talking about bad boys all I can see are assholes and parasites, couple of years ago this subject came up in a pub, guy I’d knows since forever was there, some knob says some shit about skinny fuckers like you (he’s looking at me) getting pushed around by aggressive types in the workplace, the asshole manager from hell thang, guy I’d known forever snorts beer out through his nose, has coughing fit, poked this guy in the throat, jabs a thumb towards me and says “Have you any fucking idea how many times this cunt has been arrested, and never made it to court because they couldn’t pin it on him?”
Knob looks all blank, looks at me, looks at guy I’ve known forever.
Guy I’ve known forever adds, “.. and it wasn’t all for littering either, plenty of very heavy shit in there”
And I remembered that incident talking to this girl, see, the reason I was talking was because the po-po were a few doors down, mob handed as usual, so she couldn’t go there, it was where her mate lived, so we were talking, and she tells me about her experiences with the po-po, and she’s had many, living with so called bad boys who are good for a bit of house burglary and driving without documents and that’s about it.
And I remembered it because these young cunts, they talk to da man, even when they claim they ain’t saying nuffink, they’re talking, and imparting in fo mashun…
Back in our day, it was give your name and address, cos the bastards had to have something to put on the files or they’d hang on to you, and you prolly had something on you with a name anyway, and ask for a brief (lawyer) and shut the fuck up… and I mean shut the fuck up, not saying “I’m not saying nuffink mate”, I mean keeping it fucking zipped.
They voluntarily go to social services, probation, social security, facebook, and impart information, for NOTHING in return, and when you try to tell the cunts that no good can POSSIBLY come from talking to da man…. they just look at you, and say yeah, I can see your point, and then carry on doing it.
See, even the young ones whose bodies haven’t fallen apart by the time they hit the end of puberty, the fucking minds have, so you can’t even harbour any illusions of sexual allure, because the rancid little cunts have opened their mouths and destroyed any illusion of intellect.
I was about to type “I have had fucking dogs that were smarter than these cunts”.. but on reflection, I have never had a dog as dumb as these cunts, and that’s not the same thing at all.
Is it processed foods like Coke, is it the pill, is it pthalates, is it feminazism, I don’t have a fucking clue… what I do know is that the moment you move beyond a pornographic still picture, almost everything is a boner killer, I rode a harley in the eighties because everything else was less, as the saying went… I don’t ride young skanks now (not that I’m turning down offers every week mind ewe) because everything else is more… and that is soooooooo fucked up.
What really fucks me with the young ones now is they hate my ass, and think I am bigging up myself long past the point of being totally full of crap, the reality is, there isn’t a single thing that they can utter, that I have not forgotten more about than they will ever know, so, too bad if I come across as a smartass who thinks he knows everything and who corrects everything you say, and too bad if it pisses you off.
I’ll look at you, skanky 24/25 year old that you are, and think to myself, maybe if she had all her teeth out and didn’t get dentures I’d let her suck my cock, but no way I’m putting my cock in that mouth with all those broken and decaying stumps, I’ll be up the sex clinic asking for some parrots-eat-em-all to cure the plaque on my bell end.
So, skanky little bitch, you can stand outside with nowhere to go and watch the po-po raiding your mate’s house, I’m off inside to make some fun stuff with my fucking laser, oh yeah, I have my own fucking pad, that I pay rent for, that I earn, full of shit that I paid for, including coffee and shit, and the fact is I could add your decayed ass to my household and feed and clothe and shelter you, in return for getting my balls drained and suchlike on a daily basis… with the emphasis on fucking COULD motherfucker, and frankly I don’t give a fuck you don’t think it’s a good offer cos it’s from some mingin’ old grandpa, it wasn’t a fucking offer, not to you, it’s a fucking ABILITY.
Ability, that shit that keeps decline at bay…
I could have read A poem called Ozymandias to her Instead I lived for the moment It was a futile gesture anyway I was here and she was here And being broad of minds and hips We did the only thing possible
I guess, I shouldn’t have Strangled her to death But I had to go to work And she had laced My coffee with acid
Normally I wouldn’t have minded But I’m allergic to sulphuric acid Besides she had acne And if you’ve got acne Well, I apologize for disliking it intensely
But it’s understandable That ugly people have got complexes I mean, it seems to me That ugly people don’t have a chance
It’s only the children of the fucking Wealthy who tend to be good looking An ugly fart attracts A good looking chick if he’s got money
It’s only the children of the fucking Wealthy who tend to be good looking An ugly fart attracts A good looking chick if he’s got money
It’s only the children of the fucking Wealthy who tend to be good looking An ugly fart attracts A good looking chick if he’s got money
It’s different for Jews somehow I’d like to see a passionate film Between the two ugliest people in the world When I say ugly, I don’t mean rough looking I mean hideous
Don’t tell me that aesthetics are subjective You just know the truth when you see it Whatever it is
Muscle power Muscle power Muscle power Muscle power
It’s 3 am and I have a working day tomorrow, up with a cold and cough, so having a coffee and a smoke before trying for 3 hours sleep, so this will be a shortie.
I wish I could give you all sorts of reasons like research, or because of a bet, or something, but the fact is there was nothing like that, it just happened.
“it” being me chatting to a skanky 20 something whose mum lives a couple of doors down, and this skank, and her mates, are bottom of the barrel gutter material, but, it was clear from the outset they had it in mind to play along with the old man (me) and wind the old cunt up, ok, I’m feeling like shit with the onset of the cold anyway, so what followed was two days of them trying to troll me, while me trying not to let on that there isn’t even 0.01% chance of me actually wanting to fuck either of them… or being taken for a ride / mug…
I’ll omit the gutter tales of boyfriends in prison, kids taken away by social services, STD and drink and drugs, unfit bodies, missing teeth, and so on.
What it is, is this… talk to either one alone, and you could have some sort of conversation, and one in particular told me a lot about herself, and I don’t think what she told me was too wide of the mark.
As soon as they were together, it was like being trapped in a classroom full of 6 year old with special needs.
What I am saying is, together its lets wind the old cunt up week, alone, well, who know, maybe they were still playing the wind up / prick tease (forget desirability, this is about them and their actions and motives) or maybe some of the inner yeah I’d go for that was coming out.
And the purpose of this post, it’s been so long since I have had any action other than swinging / fucking sites, that I had forgotten all about the social side of shit, I’d forgotten about chatting up wimminz, and so I’d forgotten something that these two skanks forcefully reminded me of.
So yeah, we are all playing fucking games with each other, but this remembered thing was a 16 incher droning in from over the horizon to blow up in your front yard.
The chick alone, you may get to fuck her, because she is bored, and fucking you is less boring than not fucking you.
The chicks together, that’s a whole ‘nother kind of bored, it’s special needs room temperature IQ beavis and butthead “break thtuff” bored, and it’s malicious and malevolent.
There is nothing on this planet more inane and worthless that young skank gutter ho’s, all insulated from the realities of life by the welfare state, if you wanted to fuck up ISIS just round the skanks up and ship them over there by the tens of thousands.
It’s not the STD’s or lack of morals or anything else that would fuck up ISIS, so much as the sudden drop in mean IQ (and corresponding rise back here) to the point where nobody could tip piss out of a boot with the instructions written on the sole.
I’m not even going to pay 2 pennies to fuck you, because I know you don’t have change, and I don’t want to fuck you twice.
I’m coming to an unpleasant conclusion, I’m an indolent motherfucker, or rather, I have been.
Not that I was ever a firebrand, but there was always a ok, I decided to do this, let’s get the fucker done, in between chilled periods. That’s just my personality in general.
No, what I mean is, with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight, the advent of the psycho skank ho ex FRA took the wind outta my sails, spend a year waiting for po-po to decide there is nothing worth pursuing in any of her fantasies and allegations and accusations, spend another two years slamming your head against the misandry (oh look, the spell checker hasn’t heard of the word misandry, it knows misogyny though…) and incompetence and corruption in the secret family court system then yes, you’re damn entitled to chill the fuck out afterwards.
It’s the NEXT five years that’s the kicker, and with the benefit of 20/20 hindsight, I got slack to the point of laziness, and no I am not talking about why should I bust my ass for da man, I’m talking about not doing shit for yourself in your own interests that you could be doing.
Pushing the boat out and buying this laser has been the best thing I’ve done for a while, even if it never makes me a profit, because it has triggered that change in me.. what I euphemistically called the workshop was in reality a dumping ground where lots of tools and things and projects went to be stored, and have the door closed on them… the “workshop” would have been better called “Sunny Acres Retirement Home” where all of AfOR’s shit and projects and hopes and dreams went away to die quietly of neglect.
Now, well, some / many / all of them may still die, but at least I’m fucking OUT THERE now, hell I have thrown a ton of shit away to make space, and literally moved everything else myself, including the lathe and mill which were the two heaviest lumps, and yes I got stiffness and twinges in my lower back, and even they are telling me its because I’ve been a lazy no exercise cunt for too long.
It ain’t done yet, but at least when it is I wont feel like apologising to everyone who sees the fucking place, and doing nothing to make the apology no longer necessary.
And I think, well, I think 90% of this impetus comes from one simple fact, in the scale of my life and my finances/savings (which it basically wiped out) and so on, this was a relatively big gamble.
I’ve basically wiped myself out to buy a cool toy with what I think has money earning potential, of course that and a business plan and a dollar will buy you a coffee, but that’s it, you kinda have to get off your ass and actually start making some serious efforts, which is the difference between betting the price of a coffee and betting all your spare cash, as it stands if I just sit around and make minimal efforts with the new toy and expect shit to come to me, then it’s going to be at least six lean months before I don’t have to think about every ten or twenty I take out of my wallet, can I afford this.
Up until last week I had a nice fat wad that I had built up since my last reset to zero insulating me from pretty much everything transient, and that shit makes you chilled, but it also makes you complacent.
Betting the wad like this makes you hungry, and pro-active, and active, and on the hunt, and I *like* it.
I feel more alive.
I’m not suggesting that I, or you, should have done this years ago, sooner after my FRA etc, the time has to be right and I guess it wasn’t back then, but there must have been an element of the hungry predator still in me, biding its time while circumstances changed, and now I have bitten the bullet and we shall see what we shall see.
And that is the purpose of this post, find that hungry predator inside you, and make sure it is still there, still alive, still hungry, and not farmed off to Sunny Acres Retirement Home.
